Time warped in the 70’s, Welcome to 2009

Wow. I have not updated in a long time. So sorry.

I had some special people today. By the way, I’m back in the Seekonk store, finally left the East Longmeadow for good. YAY!

So, I had to go on register 4, which I wasn’t thrilled about because I figured at some point I would get express. But I didn’t.  I got self scan instead later.

One of my first customers were these weird women.  I believe it was a mother/daughter team. The daughter was about maybe 40ish, and the mother maybe in her 60’s. They gave me these coupons from the 70’s. Legit 70’s. They were those coupons that never expire, ever.  One coupon was technically 30 cents of a glass jar of Welches Grape Juice, which we do still sell, 30 years later, but she gave me a regular refrigerated carton instead. I just let it through, but I tried to tell her what it was really for and she would not have it. Another coupon was for $1 off a carton of orange juice, also from the 70’s. The daughter got really excited over what she saved. She didn’t have a card, so I put one in for her. She used a gift card, in which she thought she saved more money because of it, but it was because I used a store card. She had me in such a tizzy. The way she acted I swore I stepped back into the ’70’s.

Then I had her mother. She was just as bad. They kept repeating themselves about “oh how much I saved” and “these coupons are from the ’70’s, because back then they didn’t expire, nowadays they do.” Near the end, after literally handing me her items two at a time, she gave me more old coupons along with some current ones. I had to hand her back coupons because you’re only allowed one coupon per item(s), depending on the coupon on. If you have a dollar off something and a 20 cent coupon for the same product, you can only use one.

Well, trying to explain that to this customer was a joke. “But there was a coupon on the box.” “Yes ma’am, but you can only use one or another. You have have  only one box and two coupons; I can only use one, and I will use the higher one.” “But there was a coupon on the box.” “Right ma’am, but I can only use one; those are the rules, I can’t make it work.”

To top it off, the daughter chimed in “Can I make a suggestion? Can they put paper bags for the corn? Those corn bags don’t hold the corn” (The way she said this sounded like a first grader trying to tell a teacher something)

“Ma’am, that’s something to tell produce. I have nothing to do with that, and we have corn bags for a reason.”

The look on her face was priceless. She wanted to know how much she saved, which was about $38, including card savings. Of course, I used my card, in which if she had her own and was a true saver, she could be getting gas points to save money off her gas at Stop and Shop stations. But she lives in the ’70’s, so we won’t go there. I wouldn’t be surprised if she still goes through full service stations because she doesn’t know how to pump her own gas. LOL.

They were real winners, and really dippy. The woman behind her was annoyed, and she was like “just smile”. Yea, no. Fuck this shit. I have a BA in English and a minor in Philosophy, and probably more intelligent than half the dimwits I work with and customers, and you want me to smile? Fuck no.

Then I had another lady argue with me about 20 cents off. I rang up these local bakery rolls that get delivered to our store that we sell as well. It rang up $2.59, and the sticker was labeled $2.39.  “But the sticker is one there. (Bitch, it isn’t even OUR store sticker, for fucking crying out loud.) So I save the woman 40 cents because she had two of them. Really? 40 cent? That won’t even buy a small pack of gum. Jesus. I know we are in a recession, but worry about dollars, not cents, especially under 50 cents.

I’m sure I have more stories, but I can’t remember right now. But I will leave you all with this absolutely hilarious one.

My last day at the East Longmeadow store, my first customer was this lady, who was upset by the price of rice cakes, that rang up $2 instead of $1.50. (Again, one of those idiotic penny pincher extremists.) She went back to look at the price (because I had special needs baggers that would take an hour just to find what aisle it’s in) and she goes “It’s like a maze over there. I can’t figure out those signs, and I see arrows point down. I have a masters degree and I can’t even read these signs. It’s really confusing for the customer and they need to fix it.” She was pissed.

I said nothing, however, I thought “Lady, I’m going to have a BA in English and a minor in Philosophy in about 4 days, and I can read those signs. I guess you missed the class ‘Common Sense 101′. Those signs really aren’t confusing.”

They really aren’t. If you read the sign, it says what size, SB means store brand, and price and the signs are there the way the chart has them, which aren’t drawn up by us. It really isn’t that hard. Honestly, it’s because people these days are in such a fucking rush, they can’t be bothered to glance to make sure they are reading the right sign. Take the time, so you don’t wait in line. Honestly, if I were to observe and do an experiment on this very subject, I’m pretty sure 90% of the time wasted in line because of an argument over a price is because of a customer’s stupidity. And if you want to know why the prices of things go up, it’s not just because people steal or the gas;  it’s because people can’t be bothered to read, then we give stuff away for free or reduced price, so then the manufacturers lose money and up the prices of everything to make up for loss, and then you customers bitch about the prices. I don’t want to hear it.