“One way, or another, I’m gonna find you, I’m gonna get ya get ya get ya”

I love thieves. They make my day.

I’m talking about “fruit boy”. “Fruit boy” started off about a month ago (at least for me).  He came in my line one day, and “didn’t have enough money for fruit” so he asked me if I had cash. I said no (which is true, I almost never carry money on me, just debit cards.) and then he asked the lady behind him. She seemed uncomfortable about it, so she quickly said no, and ignored him. So he kept bugging her, saying things like “what’s the matter? you can’t help me?” to which I was ready to kick him out of my line and take the damn nectarine. She ended up paying for it, and he left with the fruit. I then saw him talking to John Gerris (former NBA player), and leave. I apologized to the lady for the awkward moment, and I flagged John down to my register. I told him what happened, and the woman said she would take care of it anyways and I told John to watch him next time.

So the next night, I was working again, and “fruit boy” comes back. He goes straight to the service desk, and tells Shannon that he left a pear last night. That’s a lie. First of all, you “bought” a nectarine that you didn’t pay for, and then you have the nerve to come back in to say you “forgot” a pear? Get the hell out.

So then I figured his little scam, and I paid attention to his MO. He’s extremely skinny, about 5’6, freckles, reddish hair, brown eyes, always wears a baseball cap, baggy jeans and a button down shirt. Until recently, now he switches up his shirts to regular or polo shirts. But I recognize him right away. And he’s under 21, that I know because I see enough of his license sometimes to see the “under 21” bright yellow mark. Oh, and he always steals a piece of fruit.

So a week goes by, and fruit boy is back. So he tries to tell me he paid for the peach, (which I know he didn’t) but Brownie let me give it to him for free since Brownie didn’t know his scam. To which me and a few other people explained to Brownie what’s going on with that kid. So he was like “okay next time we get him.”

So then later on, he goes through self scan another day. So I see him, and warn the rest of the cashiers and the people at self scan. We had 3 people at self scan guarding as he entered one of the self scans. We didn’t see him take anything, but that doesn’t mean anything. I know we had to take some stuff from him that he “didn’t want”, and we removed it from his sight so he wouldn’t try to take it.

So weeks go by, and I heard from another cashier that “fruit boy” came in and tried to steal a trial size shaving cream in front of Norine, who’s our newest manager. Brownie said she dealt with him.

So everyone knows who “fruit boy” is.

Then he came in two nights ago. I guess he tried to get to the service desk about the fruit, but Tony (manager) denied him and told him he needs to pay for it at a register. I watched him go through Stephanie’s line, and he walked out pay for the fruit. I was excited.

So then “fruit boy” comes in last night. He bought four things, and I was waiting for him to hold the fruit back from me, claiming he paid for it, in which I think at this point I would strangle him and probably throw him out myself. He actually paid for it, and I did everything I could to bite my tongue. When he came up to me, I was tempted to say “so, are we paying for the fruit today or are we going to steal again like we have been for about a month or so now”, or say some off color comment to him. But he paid, I wished him a good day, even though I rather grab him by the ear and throw him out.

Tyler came up to me later, and asked me if we had to let him go again with free fruit. I said “no, he actually paid today”, in which we gave each other a high five and laughed.

So, “fruit boy”, if you read this, I hope you stop stealing. And, if you think you can get away with it, I am watching you. If I so even see a hint of you stealing, I will pick you up, and carry you outside for an old fashioned beating. And believe me, when I am done, you won’t be able to use those “grabby” fingers for a while. And if I get suspended for a day, I don’t care.  I’m not allowing you to steal; to raise the prices of food for us poor people who work our asses off to make a damn dime. Get a job, somewhere, anywhere, if you are desperate for money. Oh and I also won’t let you steal so that my pay gets cut and Stop and Shop can claim some bullshit that they don’t make enough money to give us a decent raise. Stop and Shop makes enough damn excuses to cut hours and not give us raises, don’t give them more reasons.

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Yahoo Answers: Is talking on the cell phone while checking out rude?

Yahoo Answers

Yes it is rude. I have to ask for your card, and then your too damn busy trying to one hand everything from card to paying.  And I don’t want to hear your damn conversation.

I’ve mentioned this several times in my blog of people just not paying attention and talking on the cell phone. One of these days I will embarrass the living fuck out of someone for talking on the cell. I may just not ring up their stuff until they’re done talking. One time I was making fun of a customer because she was putting stuff on the belt while talking, and everytime she turned her back I made facial expressions and used my hands to imitate talking. I had customers behind her in hysterics. I mean come on folks!

Get off your cell phone! Seriously! I know they made unlimited talking plans, but that’s ridiculous, OKAY?!?!?!

F My Life Moments and Other Things

Had a great FML moment today. While walking into work, I ran into Jamie Silva, and another mutual friend of ours. I said hi briefly as I had to get to work (was running a tad late) and ran upstairs. Then I had a thought.

See, Jamie is now a rookie NFL player for the Indianapolis Colts. He’s number 40 I believe if anyone cares. Which I’m happy for him, he deserves it. I actually called it about 11 years ago when we were in 8th grade at Riverside Jr (now Middle) School. (Should’ve betted people on it, might be a millionaire right now, anyways).  Any who, so I put on Fmylife.com (it may get published), I wrote:

 “Today, I ran into an old high school friend. We graduated the same year and we both went to pricey prestigious colleges. He is now a rookie NFL player for the Indianapolis Colts, and I am a cashier at a grocery store. FML.”

Another FML moment was when I asked my editor at the newspaper I intern for if I could get harder stories. I sent the email Sunday night. Monday I get two phone calls. The first one was for more hours at Stop and Shop. Then my editor called to do a story that night, which I couldn’t do because I just accepted more hours at work. FML.  Can’t win.

So I’ve been looking for a job in journalism, and I “harass” (in quotes for a reason) people I know who may be able to get me a job somewhere. I had one customer give my resume to the Providence Journal publisher that he knows. (And apparently works for him as a second job.) Then I ask the guys who come in from WPRI/FOX  down the street. Another one of my customers works at a radio station and GEM plumbing is trying to get me a job at either place, since there will be openings soon. ( I hate the word “soon”, because soon to me means anywhere between now and a week from now. “Soon” to other people may mean months.)

I mention to random customers, some have taken my business cards in promise to try to help me if they hear anything. So far, no luck.

I really need to leave because Stop and Shop is driving me nuts.  We have this new lady who does our schedule now, and she still doesn’t have a damn clue.  She’s really nice, don’t get me wrong, but she can’t do a damn schedule for shit. I wish Tessier was back. As anal as he could be sometimes, and pissy, he at least did a schedule right.

The first couple of weeks she fucked it up because my sister and Burr can’t drive, and she’d have them on when me or my mom couldn’t take them.  Then she was fine for a while; I got two days off a week, Tue’s and Thur’s, which was nice, because then I got breaks every few days. Then my mom went on vacation. Both last week and this week we had meetings, which screwed everything up, plus she didn’t have people in until midnight when we close on two of the nights. So we had to make Brownie stay, who was sick as a dog and should be home. Then I got Brownie’s cold/flu/ whatever he had, so now I’m sick. I had to take Burr and Joy back and forth all last week, and I got little rest. Which is probably why I got sick. I actually had to bring my sis home one day while clocked in because she had no way home because of the way she did the schedule…GRRRRRRRR!!!!

And the meetings are dumb. Really, really dumb. I had Nelson, our store manager, run our meeting. He tried joking around with us. It was interesting, and I didn’t notice until our meeting that he had an accent, and couldn’t pronounce certain words correctly. I tried hard not to laugh at him. While we were at the meeting, part of it was talking about the percentages going up as far as  with customers and whatnot. The percentages were anywhere from 1-3%. And my manager said that that was good. GOOD? How is that good? That’s terrible! If we really improved on our service and stuff, it should be HIGHER. Good would be like 10% or higher. Not 1 or 3%.

And then I brought up the new policy about the bags. When customers bring bags in, they get 5 cents off their order PER BAG THEY USE. Or at least that was the policy. Then we got a notification of a complaint a woman had about cashiers not putting in the right amount of bags they used. So now we have to put in the bag credit for every bag they have. The problem is this one of two things: If they have 10 items, and 11 bags, it doesn’t work. You can’t go past 10 bags, if that. I also noticed that if they bought something on sale, like soda, and you have to buy so many to get that price, like 5 for $5, if you just buy that, the sale deletes itself if you put bags on. Then you pay full price, because the bag credit is considered a coupon.

Our manager did not know this. Of course not, why would you? You don’t use a register. What pisses me off about management and corporate is that they give these rules you can’t do and makes things harder, because we are using a system that doesn’t allow for certain things to happen. Like giving a customer bag credits, or doing a certain type of refund or whatever. The computer only does what it’s allowed to when programmed. When you change the rules, the computer isn’t updated to the way the new rules are set. DUH. Which is why I can’t give a woman 11 bag credits for 10 items, or give a customer a certain price for something because we want to make “THEM” happy.

And I hate condescending customers. I had an idiot at 11pm trying to tell me what vegetables he was buying as I was ringing them in. I told him “sir, I know what they are”. Like seriously, I’ve been eating vegetables since I was allowed to eat solids. I’m 24 years old.  I’ve been working for Stop and Shop for (gag) 6 years. I think I know by now the difference between an onion and a banana. OK?

Then I had this one idiot a couple of weeks ago. He asked me if I was express. I said “no, if I was I would have a red light on.” He says “I know, but just wanted to ask” WHY, SO YOU CAN WASTE YOUR BREATHE ON STUPID QUESTIONS? Like seriously, you probably just killed 10 trees in the rainforest by even speaking.

I had another lady shove her Stop and Shop card in my face. I really hate when people do that, it makes me want to hit them with their card. Seriously.

I’ve had other stories and moments, and as soon as I remember them, you will all enjoy another update. Irate Worker is ill, so hopefully I’ll feel better soon.

In the meantime, if anyones interested in writing to this blog, let me know! If I get a new job (whenever the hell that is), I’ll let someone take over this blog. Email on the front page, title the subject line “Irate Worker”.

One of these days…

I apologize for not updating in a while. It’s been nuts around here.

A couple of weeks ago, the fire alarm went off ten times during the 5 1/2 hours I worked one Sunday. It started because some idiot working on the vents on the roof decided to have a cigarette and set off the alarms. Then he took off, so we had to research what company was doing work at our store to track down the fool.  The fire alarms continued to go off because it decided to malfunction. Thanks asswipe.

More recently special people as well. The other day I was covering self scan, and this guy clearly is shoving his shit down the belt and I told him he had to stop doing that for self scan to work. He goes “I don’t have the patience for this. It should just go.”

Well it does you dumb fuck if you just put it down it will eventually go down. This isn’t a regular register where we leave the belts on and as we scan your shit goes. I was tempted to tell him if he didn’t have the patience to do self scan then go through the regular line and don’t piss me off. I don’t care what that stupid sign says self scan isn’t the fastest way to go and more pain in the ass than anything else.

And then there are these new Stop and Shop cards, which is just to aggravate me more. They have a stripe on it for swiping at some point (which means I can no longer make fun of idiots who swipe their Stop and Shop card through the credit machine…damn) and I’ve had one customer sign it, who said it was difficult to sign and I told her she wasn’t supposed to do it (I mean for the love of God it doesn’t say “sign here” and obviously looks like a credit card strip than a place for you to sign) and she’s like how do you get it off? I’m I don’t know you idiot, but I’m pretty sure when it comes time for people to swipe you’ll have to get a new card.

Then there’s that stupid 5% off your next order crap, which I will explain. When you get your card, and go online or call the 1-800 number, you activate the 5% off your next order. However, it comes off whatever your next order is, so if you just buy a pack of gum you’re screwed. I’ve been telling customers not to sign up until you’re ready to do a big shopping. They say you need your big card but that’s not true it works on the little ones as well. I don’t know why they said that because both cards have the same frickin’ number. In some cases people haven’t card their cards yet (you will by the 30th, if not just stop in at Stop and Shop or go online to get a new card. If you’ve moved since you’ve signed up and have not updated I recommend you do that as well.) And some people their 5% doesn’t work at all.

Just another headache. Thanks corporate.

And for the record folks stop asking me if I’m fucking open. Like before it used to be just me standing there with my light on and people would ask, but now I have baggers with my light on and standing there and I still get people who go “are you open?” DUHHHHH

I had  a real genius a couple of weeks ago. This lady comes in my line on her cell phone (people, stay the fuck off the damn phone I’m sure the conversation can wait) and she has these glass bottles that come in four packs, with two different flavors. I said “ma’am, you can’t mix these” and she’s like you can’t and I’m like no. How do I know the next customer wants half grape half orange flavor soda? This isn’t the fucking liquor store where you can mix the smirnoff. Jeez….

Speaking of phones, I had this one guy come through my express lane, who talked on his phone the entire time. As soon I was done the guy starts taking off the with the stuff and I yell “sir, you have to pay!” He turns around and goes “sorry” while still one the phone and says “I did this at the gas station earlier this week too”

Well then Houston we have a problem. Maybe, just maybe it could be GET OFF YOUR FUCKING CELL PHONE? I mean if this is the second time this week you forgot to pay because your too damn busy on the phone, maybe you should cut down on the unlimited talk plan with your carrier.

I swear to God I’ve seen it all.

Oh and there’s still people pissing/shitting all over the bathroom and one case in the store itself. Depends anyone? Invest in it, or go back to basic potty training. Jeez….

Self Scan Hell…

I hate self scan and it seriously needs to be banned. And those God forsaken easy scan its.

The other night I was working, a guy came in my line with a easy scan it and put all his shit on the belt. I was like you need to bag that stuff that was the fucking point of using easy scan its. So I scan the gun and I asked him for his card.

“I don’t have my card.”

Me, being confused, asked him how did he get the gun without the card (because you need it in order get a gun; you scan your store card and a gun lights up for you to grab.) “Oh, some lady let me borrow hers.”

Well that’s just great dude. Now that I ended his order, I don’t know if that lady has gone through yet or not with her card and groceries. I explained the problem, scanned his order, and then got rid of my line, and ran over to the place where the guns are kept to reset it.

Here’s what could’ve happened. If that woman had not gone through yet, and the gun was still in the mode to finish and pay, that lady if going in line within the time period, could’ve been paying for his groceries as well as hers. Because the gun he used all his groceries for are on her card, and if scanned, the items pop up on the bill. Then she would’ve been left wondering what all these groceries are, and since she might not have bought the same stuff as him, we would have to void the order out and rescan her groceries.

It was idiotic on both parts. Both of them should’ve known you can’t “borrow” a card to use the easy scan its, if we did that there would be more problems.

Self scan was fine for the first half hour, then it got swamped. I watched a number of stupid things today.

I still don’t know why people are sliding their Stop and Shop cards through a credit card machine. To make it even funnier to watch, this one lady told me she was looking for her receipt after she finished buying her stuff. She was sliding her Stop and Shop card through a credit card machine to get her slip….hmmm. She claimed it was her first time. Well even if it isn’t your first time, obviously you wouldn’t slide a card to grab a receipt from the machine. What an idiot.

I saw another foolish lady trying to sign for her credit card, except instead of trying to sign in places where I know people  get confused, like the screen where you see your receipt, or the other screen where you process your card, she was trying to sign the small tv screen where you can see yourself, because you’re on camera. Who the hell tries to sign on a camera, when you can clearly see yourself when doing it? It’s not like it was one of the broken cameras where I can see that it’s black because it’s blanked out. And why would you sign something up in the air like that? Who does that?

And during that time period, I was going back and forth bagging for my mom, and I walked into a middle of a situation.

Apparently a woman customer had bags on top of her groceries, and my mom inquired on them. They were our regular plastic bags, so usually we don’t think of them as being reused, because most people don’t. So apparently the woman was appalled by this and got upset. She was like “I’m here all the time, and they looked use, and you insulted me.”

How is she insulting you? You know how many people grab bags off a register to use? And they look wrinkled, anyone can wrinkle the bags, doesn’t make them used. Maybe look used but not necessarily. It’s not an insult. And we’ve never seen you before. What a fucking moron. We gave a bag credit now get the fuck out…lol.

I can’t complain too much except watching a lot of moronic stuff. And being really busy. And we need to hire more people. We had two cashiers on and self scan. Like hello? From 7 to when I left all we had was two cashiers, almost no baggers and self scan. Cutting hours is not working. Add more hours or hire more people or both. Ever since my boss cut hours we’ve had unneccessary lines. It’s not busy, just stupid things. I’m used to having 30 hours during the summer, I’ve gotten close once and since I’ve not gotten more than 20ish hours. Makes me mad.

Need a new job. Sooner rather than later.

No, really?

As a side note, getting your tonsils out and a UPPP sucks. So bad I lost my voice and sounded like a four year old girl. Which going back to work after that, I was hoping I’d get my voice back. I did finally.

So during my two weeks out of work, I would go in to get prescriptions and stuff, and my coworkers laughed at me because of my voice. I wasn’t exactly amused.

Later on this week I will have two self scan shifts, so get prepared for more annoyance from me and probably stupid customer stuff.

I’m getting really sick of dumb people. Like if I have a register with the handicapped symbol, people ask if they can come in since it says handicapped, yet half the time you see well able bodied people ahead of them buying their stuff. Duh.

Or when clearly my light is on and I’m standing there bored out of my brain, and they’re like “Are you open?” No, I just feel like standing here getting paid to do nothing. Of course I’m open, get in my fucking line already and get out.

And I also seemed to lately get really slow people. Not old, just slow. Like they take their time to leave. Go home already.

I had this really special dude a few days ago. I have a line, and this guy comes in (I think I’ve seen him at Shaws. I think he’s deaf, not sure, but makes a lot of  hand motions and doesn’t talk.)  Anyways, he comes up to me, rubs his tummy and points to candy. Then he takes out this coin and covers up most of it except for the part that says “Roman Catholic” and points at me. At which I shook my head no, I’m not Roman Catholic, or Catholic for that matter. Then he leaves.

So I interpret his motions to be “I’m hungry for candy; are you Roman Catholic?” What does that have to do with the price of peanut butter, I have no idea.

It was pretty funny. Then, a few minutes later, he walks  out with a bag of groceries, waves at me, rubs tummy and points to bag, and waves goodbye. Sure dude, whatever.

Then yesterday was the first time I’ve seen a customer wear an appropiate shirt for themselves. This guy comes in, speaking in Portuguese (which drives me up a wall) on his cell phone. (People talking on cell phones generally annoy me, and other customers, but even worse when speaking another language.) He was wearing a shirt that had a picture of a guy sitting on the couch playing video games, with a caption that read “Not now I’m busy”.

He spent most of the time in my line talking. His shirt should’ve had a pic of someone on their cell phone, but either way, his shirt fit the situation at the time.

I hate annoying people.

You know you’ve worked too long at your job when…

…you get hit on by a customer you’ve been waiting on for years and know most of his personal life. Yea, wasn’t I a lucky duck today?

I went in to work today to deal with cluster fuck of problems.

I’m having surgery on my tonsils on Tues and the doctor wanted me to have 10 days of recovery, so I took 10 days off from work, the 16th-26th. Well then, more things came up.

I didn’t think to ask to work earlier in the day on Monday, because I can’t eat after midnight, and I usually work until midnight. I’d like to eat before I can no longer eat, so I switched with someone so I can get out of work early and be able to have a dinner and snack before bed.

My mom didn’t think to ask for the night off, because she has to drive me early in the morning to be knocked out (again for the 2nd time this year, and the 4th time in the past 3 years.) at the hospital. So we had to switch her schedule too, just to drive everyone nuts.

Apparently the person who does the schedule was in a bad mood, so we avoided him and went to another manager during work to deal with the switching. It really isn’t a big deal, but I don’t want to deal with my boss’s wrath. I’m all set thank you. The people we switched with were willing, so it made my life easier.

I was given a million yellow shirts; I just needed one, not five.

I saw my friend Burke for the first time in a long time and we chit chatted across the way, when I saw “Aids”.

We call this guy “Aids” because he has huge hearing aids out of his ears, because he’s partially deaf.

I’ve known this guy before I even worked at Stop and Shop, he’s been a regular customer for years and a pain in the ass. We knew his now ex-wife, daughter and now grand kid, and he was an usher at my mom’s ex-boyfriend’s church. The dude is near his 50’s. He lives in the same city as me, unfortunately.

A few weeks ago, my sister and I were shopping when he was congratulating me on graduating from college. He then told me what he did on his graduating day or whatever, and he says to me “we should take a trip sometime”. So I thought he was joking, and he followed me around a bit and I told my sister “I think he’s trying to hit on me”, so we left him in the dust. We waited until he left so we could check out.

 Today he comes in, and I have a big order, and he has 3 cans of cat food and bottle returns. I was hoping he would leave, but instead he stays. I had a feeling he was going to hit on me again.

So he goes “Me and my friend are having a party this weekend, wanna come?” I told him I would be working all weekend. “Well, when are you free?” (I’m like dude leave me the fuck alone) But I told him I was busy and getting my tonsils out, so I would be out of work for a while.  He was like aww no partying for a while and I’m like no partying or drinking. He also asked me for my number, which I lied and said my phone’s broken and I have to get a new one.

I got him to leave, but I told my coworkers and my mom. This is ridiculous. If I was anywhere else, I could’ve told him off in the meanest way possible. But I had to be nice because I was at work. I was so pissed.

He hits on me one more time, I’m getting a restraining order. I wonder if his next move is to assault me. He’s fucking creepy and I don’t like it. He’s cool as a customer friendship type deal, not a pervert like he’s being now. I don’t know if it’s because his wife left him (although I heard they still live together, what the fuck?) and he’s lonely or whatever, but don’t come near me. I don’t want you or your damn baggage.

I really need to get out of Stop and Shop, or at least out of this area. I can’t take this anymore. Between dealing with stupid customers and mean people and shit like this, I’m gonna go nuts. Not that it doesn’t happen anywhere else, but I rather work in a smaller enviroment that is a bit safer at least.

So, I think from now on if I leave work without my mom or someone else, I’m asking to get walked out with someone. And I think if I see him again I’m going to have someone take over my register so I don’t deal with him. I hope to God I don’t need to call my lawyer and deal with this man.